Saturday, November 24, 2012

Late for Giving Thanks

(in no order and certainly incomplete) I'm thankful:

- for Health. Mine, my families, my friends. It's the basic thing that without our health, we have a whole pile of horrible stuff to deal with. With our health in tact, we can focus on other stuff and have a good life. We can create and dance and sing and think and laugh and kiss and not worry.

- for my Daughter. She is a wonderful kid. I am lucky to know her. She has poise and smarts and a wicked sense of humor and beauty and possesses light and she is totally perfect (for our family and just the way she is.) I love her and love her.

- for my Husband. What a year it's been for us. And he has been here fighting and working and sleeping and playing and being a dad and provider through all of it. His patience is astounding. I am lucky to know him too.

- to my friends and family. What a huge heaping pile of love that is...thanks to you for your support, friendship, listening, interrupting, talking, living here in these places with me. I need you and love you and am lost without you. Thanks.

- for my job. It's better now. Less stressful. Nice work flexibility, (working from home is such a freaking awesome thing) good people there, getting stuff done makes me feel good.

- for the rest of the stuff I have: shelter, food, reliable car, clothes, nice dishes, soft bed and couch, leftover cranberry sauce, etc.

- for my (early) birthday present: Kindle Paperwhite. I might just love you. (Yes, it is unlike me to truly love an object--I feel that most "stuff" is easycomeeasygo, but a Kindle? It's a different love. eBooks are fantastic and immediate and you can rent them free from the library--and less book clutter. Totally awesome dudeman.)

- for beauty. I am thankful for beauty. I have been looking for it and finding it a lot recently. Beauty is out there.

- for you. My small and loyal readers. I left you off to the last because I knew that you would read this far. Thank you. Thank you for being the "you" that I write to. Thanks for reading and living through some of the pain and joy with me.

My heart is full of thanks. It's honest. The practice of giving thanks is a daily thing for me. I encourage you all to try it every day. For those of you that pray, it's sort of more natural. For the rest, it takes practice. It's a worthy thing to do. When I walk out in nature or when I drive to work, I list up all the things that I'm grateful's a long list. I'm thankful that my thanksgiving list is long.

Give it a try. Write it down. Sing it. Say it aloud. Tell your friends and family when you're thankful for them. It's such an easy and small gift you can give and it's free.

I must be drinking the KoolAid because I have that warm fuzzy feeling this morning. I am straight cheese. I will return to normal programing later this week.

Friday, November 9, 2012

Random thought of the day.

Do you remember those cars from the 70s or maybe 80s that had back seats the lifted up and had storage underneath? Wft was that used for? Tire irons and jacks? Drug smuggling? Dirt collecting? Mouse house? What else? I think that was in Beetles and maybe Karmann Ghias. i always thought that was strange. I remember the car being small too, like it was super awkward to get in the back and lift up the seat to get underneath, but as a kid, you had to do just that.

Why when you're a kid, are secret things the coolest? Hidden treasures, boxes with locked lids, treehouses, locked diaries.

More’s another good cover-off:

Wednesday, November 7, 2012

And maybe if everything is quiet for awhile I can write and do yoga and read…

I think this every day. Then the day goes by super fast, hyper warp speed, much faster than a speeding bullet.

I am finally watching Walking Dead. Made it through the first 2 seasons (thank you Netflix)—it has that slightly hokey drama that LOST had---long shoots of someone’s face after overhearing some tidbit, or discovering two people together, oh wait, there's a zombie, dududun. But it makes me glad that there aren’t zombies walking around trying to eat our brains and every thing else. Zombies are boring too…nothing but mehhhhhhhhhhh meeeehhhhhhhhh mhhhhhhhh all the time. Bo-RING. But the show is fun. I like that whole, What would you do if?-end-of-the-world thing. Those shows that are all over the place right now. At first, when I heard about Walking Dead, I was like, “Wow, this will be a short-lived show. For how long can the world outrun zombie invasion.” And yet…it’s more of a survival show (like LOST and Survivor and Revolution, etc.) What would you and what wouldn’t you do to survive?  Hey, now, that is sounding more relevant, isn’t it?

Without money and “normal” ways of making money and getting food/medicine/love/happiness/shelter what would you do? Who of us are not in a similar place now with the economy and jobs and debt and bills and the future of our planet? What are you cutting back to get by?  What does it mean to get by? What about all the other stuff; the creating, and relaxing, and loving, and time for fun? It's no fun working so so hard just to barely get by. "get by" what? Get by one more day? Get by another week? Shwoo, we made it another week honey! That's fucking painful.  Where's all the joy? Where's all the life? Fun? Ever heard of it? 

Would you rather me talk about Zombies again? 

The best part about Walking Dead is no cell phone no computers no tv. They work and talk and run and fight and eat and sleep. That’s it. Do you know how much I would love to have one dinner, with one person without the cell phone/texting/email/justcheckingtoseewhoitis interruptions?  Can’t people just sit and eat and talk without checking email? What is wrong with us?

I do it too. And I do chide myself for it. Distraction is our new motto. We need to focus ourselves to get through this tough time. Focus and plan and make strategic moves, not panic and rush around doing stupid reactionary shit and constantly checking our phones.

Focus. Plan. Do. My lecture to myself. Sorry.

Tuesday, November 6, 2012


I should probably write something.

I voted. Voting is cool.  But. Politics are such a joke. Twiddle dumb or twiddle dumber. It always feels like a double or triple bind. I greatly dislike the social hypocrisy of the Republicans and find the democrats too invasive and poor money managers. There is no party for me to join (oh, what a pity--except the pity party, of course. Join me?) Now how indeed did that turn into a silly poem? Politics aside, now (and thank you once again candidates for killing our airwaves with total horseshit. We are so tired of hearing your rigmarole. It's the best part of the end of the election, radio silence until the next natural disaster/terrorist/school shooting.)

I had fun watching Haunted Honeymoon on Halloween night. D fell asleep. I laughed at Gene Wilder, who I love, despite my cooler self. Gene Wilder is lovely. Oh, and that Gilda Radnor. What a gal?

I think I will go on a Gene Wilder binge.  I bet they are all on Netflix.

I am still not eating anything. No dairy, no meat, no wheat, yeast or gluten, super reduced caffeine, no smokes. I feel like 100,000 times better. Fruit and vegetables rock. My skin is better. I feel lighter and less ill and have more mobility and better sleep and less exhaustion in the day time. Who needs a nap when you have vegetables?

The cold is breaking my stride. It has caught me off guard this year. I feel unprepared. It went from summer to winter. Yuck.

My daughter is amazing. She is learning Christmas carols. I am planning a great holiday for us. She will really like it--the lights and songs and tree and hoopla. The first time she will remember I bet. How cool is that?