I used to carry two bullets in my pocket. A boy gave them to me (along with other trinkets; a miniature decorative pill case filled with dried flowers, tiny strangely colored rocks, two broken cameo rings pressed in concrete.) I carried the bullets with me everywhere for the better part of a year (which is like 10 years when you're a teenager) and I would rub them like a worry stone deep in my pocket. Wore them to a shine like the satin edges of my baby blanket. Without any thought to them being actual bullets, they were charms that kept me safe and brought me comfort. They were part of a series of scared objects, lucky charms that I’ve had in my life.
[Can you imagine that now…a girl in high school with two bullets in her pocket?!?!?!? Holy fucking shit. I also had a bumper sticker that read “CARBOMB” which was hilarious to me at the time—my car was a piece—at a time when car bombs were only in James Bond movies. Times they are a changin’ baby.]
I have been on the lookout for a new talisman for myself (and one for a friend in need.) These are not things that you can just go to Target and buy. Good talismans are found or discovered and have an emotional weight/connection that holds and harbors the power, the connection.
Do I believe in magic? I believe in healing. I believe in God and the power of the human mind. Why do I like farm-raised organic meat from the farmer’s market? It makes me feel good about myself (and it tastes better.) There is a tremendous amount of power in things/objects/ideas/mantras that make us feel safe or better or well or saved or comforted. That is organic (both "universal" and the meat.) That is healing. That is God.
So, yes, I believe in magic. I believe that a talisman can help you when you need help. It helps us focus our minds on something…gives us a place to put that thought, that energy. It is like prayer. It’s specific—it helps us direct our wants and wishes and sends all of our energy into one space. Most of us have these charms (real or imagined) in our lives.
I am powerful. When I focus on something and really stay focused, I can make it happen. [yes, it sounds so witchy.] I forgot that for a long time.
I remember now. Talisman or not.