This morning my head is full of chatter. In my excitement my mind is busy nitpicking around, picking myself apart subtly.
- Will I be the most inexperienced yogi there? Yes. I'm sure I will.
- Will I be the oldest student? Maybe.
- Will I have anything to offer to the class?
- Will I offer too much?
- Be authentic. Do it. Do it now.
- Be quiet. But not too quiet. Be yourself. But not all of yourself.
School girl's nerves on a grown woman is tiresome at best.
So, I sat on my mat and took some big belly breaths and thought about all the lessons I've learned so far as a yogi, lessons for asana practice and for life practice.
Find your edge.
Go right up to your edge. How does it feel? Go over it or pull back. It's your edge.
Stay when it's hard.
Don't back away. Don't wiggle or rinse it out. Stay. Don't shift. Breathe. Hold here.
Breath is power, heat, pause, guide, force, flow, stop and start, release.
Soften somewhere. Find strength somewhere else.
You can't be strong everywhere all the time. Soften somewhere so you can be stronger somewhere else.
Wobbles + Drishti = Strength/Growth
Are you looking for an exit?
When something is challenging, are you looking for a way out, the next pose, the next release? Honor your practice where it is at that very moment, and stay, breathe, be there and nowhere else.
Writing meditation to clear the chatter in my noisy brain. I'm so excited for training. I feel better now. After all, I'm just getting my wobbles out.